LATEST

DREAMTEAM CUP

REPORTS

PREVIOUS RESULTS

HONOURS

MEET THE MANAGER

DREAMTEAM A-Z

TEAMS 2001-2002
» 1897 The Golden Year
» 1FC Laundromat
» Aoife's XI
» A Taste of the Raj
» Athletico Salford
» Billy's Boots
» Birmingham Shitty
» Bill S Preston North End
» Clint Bizzell Juniors
» Crazyhorse FC
» Crumbs DM
» Duck United
» Feck-Arse-Nil FC
» Gazton Villa
» Hicky's Heroes
» Keane As Mustard
» Lion of Vienna Sleeps
    Tonight

» Luke Perry All-Stars
» Partick Duffy Thistle
» Oh Sheffield
» Roísíns XI
» Salford Strokers
» Soft Centres
» Spakatak Toxteth
» Supersonic FC
» The Darling Dubs That
    Play

» The Lone Rangers
    Return

» Torpedo Bermondsey
» Whatever
» Woodbourne Rovers

ARCHIVE
» Teams 2000-2001
» Teams 1999-2000
» Gary's Dance

HOW TO PLAY
» Goalkeepers
» Defenders
» Midfielders
» Strikers

MESSAGEBOARD

EMAIL

Last poll:
Who has been the biggest waste of money so far?


1. Jaap Stam
27 votes (18%)

2. Sergei Rebrov
23 votes (15%)

3. Mark Schwarzer
21 votes (14%)

 
 
SEASON 1999/2000

What time is it Mr. Wolf?

6 April 2000


Sharks are notorious creatures. None more so than the Great White. A Great White can survive for weeks on the blubber of one fully grown, male sea-lion. Their other favourite dish are seal cubs. Each year these creatures swim to the birthing shores of the sea and lie in wait - just beyond the surf. There they like to play a variant of the childhood game "What time is it Mr. Wolf?" Allowing the seal cubs to swim a little further out each time before swallowing them whole. In many respects, Pasta My Arse is playing "What time is it Mr. Wolf?" with the top two teams. He’s let them swim a bit away and has lay in wait ready to pounce.

Now the time has come for them to be gobbled up.

A shark can smell blood miles away. Ash can sniff a free tenner from roughly the same distance. Whether Ash will become the big fish in a little pond, only time will tell, but the shark comparisons will continue....

Top is Callum - the tiger shark who went around eating everything at the beginning but now finds pickings bare while the AV dept are the bull shark - capable of swimming in fresh and salt water and deadly in both.

Rob is the mako - verocious, nasty and wants to be one of the big guys. I myself suffer from the age old shark adage that if they stop swimming, they will die. My team stopped swimming weeks ago and are now simply treading water before they sink.

Ron is a Hammerhead. Just because he’s freaky to look at. Nic has been one of the may sharks that hide in the sand, ready to pounce, while Dave is a Threasher shark, the fastest shark alive...when moving in the right direction.

Fletch is surely the Whale Shark. The biggest fish in the world, but not really a big eater and not really a killer. Simon can best be described as a blue shark - not sure if it’s a killer or swimmer, so it just swims close to the other sharks - but not too close - while at the bottom we have the saddest sharks of all

Gary is like the once common dogfish that populated the coastlines of Britain. Many of these sharks wound up in the local fishshop as Rock and found themselves in the same predicament as Gazton Villa - Battered.

And finally we have Nity - the Cookie-cutter. Small, sharp mouth, a bit of nuisance but relatively harmless.

I’m off to lie in a darkened room. Usual replies from the usual fish.

Back to reports