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DREAMTEAM A-Z

TEAMS 2001-2002
╗ 1897 The Golden Year
╗ 1FC Laundromat
╗ Aoife's XI
╗ A Taste of the Raj
╗ Athletico Salford
╗ Billy's Boots
╗ Birmingham Shitty
╗ Bill S Preston North End
╗ Clint Bizzell Juniors
╗ Crazyhorse FC
╗ Crumbs DM
╗ Duck United
╗ Feck-Arse-Nil FC
╗ Gazton Villa
╗ Hicky's Heroes
╗ Keane As Mustard
╗ Lion of Vienna Sleeps
    Tonight

╗ Luke Perry All-Stars
╗ Partick Duffy Thistle
╗ Oh Sheffield
╗ Roísíns XI
╗ Salford Strokers
╗ Soft Centres
╗ Spakatak Toxteth
╗ Supersonic FC
╗ The Darling Dubs That
    Play

╗ The Lone Rangers
    Return

╗ Torpedo Bermondsey
╗ Whatever
╗ Woodbourne Rovers

ARCHIVE
╗ Teams 2000-2001
╗ Teams 1999-2000
╗ Gary's Dance

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Last poll:
Who has been the biggest waste of money so far?


1. Jaap Stam
27 votes (18%)

2. Sergei Rebrov
23 votes (15%)

3. Mark Schwarzer
21 votes (14%)

 
 
Dreamteam A-Z
1897 - The Golden Year
One the original founder members of the Dreamteam, they took their name from Aston Villa's Double-winning season. However, The Golden Year have yet to emulate the team they set out to, er, emulate. After two disappointing seasons they'll be looking for a marked improvement next year.
 
A Taste of the Raj
Another founding member, A Taste of the Raj "enjoyed" a degree of success in their inaugural season after finishing rock bottom. Having won the Wooden Spoon, they made a gallant effort to achieve a unique double and nab the Fair Play Award in their second year, but ended up falling short.
 
Athletico Salford
Failed to set the world alight in their debut season. One suspects that the people of Salford will be hoping to see something better in 2002.
 
Billy's Boots
Billy's Boots are something of a unique bunch in the field of dreams. Having claimed 3rd spot in 1999/2000, they followed that up by winning the inaugural Dreamteam Cup the following season, becoming the only team to win something both years in doing so. They hope to complete the hattrick by walking off with next season's title.
 
Bill S Preston North End
Formed in 2000, Bill S Preston NE had a pretty solid debut season and were unlucky to finish outside the money. Manager RB Voce is confident he can build on this and they are looking good as contenders for the 2001/2002 crown.
 
Birmingham Shitty
Another founding member, Birmingham Shitty have lived up to their name ever since they came into being and have been spectacularly bad. The Carlisle United of the Dreamteam.
 
Crazyhorse FC
One of the original founding members, Crazyhorse FC have had two "if only" seasons thanks to poor selections up front. The 'Horse have dallied with the likes of Darren Huckerby, Steffan Iversen and Cedric Roussel in the hope of finding the next Boy Wonder and even had Emile Heskey on their books for a while. That and the odd naff selection in defence (Andy Hinchcliffe and Ben Thatcher spring to mind) have seen them achieve midtable respectability but very little else.
 
Crumbs DM
Formerly known as Pasta My Arse, Crumbs DM have garnered a reputation for being quick out of the blocks but lacking the stamina to go all the way. Top in 1999/2000 and 2000/01, they failed to hold onto their lead and have fallen agonizingly close to the money on both actions. See Pasta My Arse.
 
Duck Utd
For a single season, Duck Utd's star shone very brightly, almost eclipsing the rest of the competition. They came, they saw and they almost conquered but an over-reliance on an aging Teddy Sheringham so them slip to 3rd in the run in. They may return sometime in the near future, but till then, we are left with nothing but the memories of a long stretch at the top.
 
Freakin' Last  
One of the original founder members, Freakin' Last were formed as part of a cunningly devious attempt to nab the Wooden Spoon in the League's debut season. However, it all went tits up when A Taste of the Raj walked off with the trophy without even breaking sweat. Seeing the error of his ways, manager Nick Fletcher decided not to follow the same path in 2000/01 and it paid dividends when Freakin' Last nabbed fourth spot in the last week of the season.
 
Gazton Villa
Manager Gary Delaney had high hopes for Gazton Villa when they were formed back in the summer of 1999, but his young team took time to gel, and in the end they could only finish one spot off of the bottom. Last year saw a marked improvement in fortunes and a Top Ten finish, which bodes well for the future. Looks to be a candidate for the title this time around as long as he avoids the silly buys that have undermined his teams in the past - Noel Whelan, anyone?
 
I Just Haven't Got A Clue First XV  
A late entrant in the League's debut season, RB Voce's First XV were left playing catch-up for the remainder of the season. They put in a gallant effort and finished 8th overall. Not bad for a side that missed out on two weeks worth of points. See Lion of Vienna Sleeps Tonight.
 
Lion of Vienna Sleeps Tonight
Previously known as I Haven't Got A Clue First XV, the Lion of Vienna Sleeps Tonight overcame the handicap of having a preposterously long moniker for the second season running to finish 15th and claim the Fair Play Award. Unlikely to improve on their performance next season and could finish last. See I Haven't Got A Clue First XV.
 
Luke Perry All-Stars
Having endured a pretty dismal year in 1999/2000, the Luke Perry All-Stars regrouped and hit the comeback trail in pretty spectacular style. All that stood between them and a unique, historic double was a last minute goal from Emile Heskey. In the end, they had to settle for just the Championship but there's no denying that they had a great year. There or thereabouts all season, a late surge saw them overtake Duck Utd and after fighting off a late challenge from St. Reatham FC, they nabbed their first piece of silverware and the Dreamteam title.
 
Michael Bolton Wanderers  
Another founding member of the League, Michael Bolton Wanderers began life in 1999 as Ocean's XI and came from nowhere to claim the Runners-up spot in the League's first season. Poor form and the loss of key players saw the Wanderers struggle to make any impact in the early part of the 2000/01 season. In fact, manager Rob Hick was so despondent that he refused to enter the transfer market and wrote the season off but then his players returned to form and slowly, but surely, they moved up the table. Had the season lasted another month, who knows what would have happened, but in the end they had to settle for a respectable Top Ten finish. See Ocean's XI.
 
Ocean's XI  
Second in 1999/2000, Ocean's XI underwent a name change during the summer and became Michael Bolton Wanderers. Grabbed second spot in the last week of the season to deny Pasta My Arse a money-winning spot. See Michael Bolton Wanderers.
 
Partick Duffy Thistle
Partick Duffy Thistle's season never really got going as they stumbled out of the starting blocks. Manager Cory Tallent is sure to have learnt the harsh lessons handed out to him in his debut season.
 
Pasta My Arse  
Having been in the top three for most of the season, Pasta My Arse found themselves in fourth place and out of the money on the last day of the season. It had been a good year for one of the founding members until then. My, how we laughed. See Crumbs DM
 
Rushden Anne Diamonds  
Great name, crap team.
 
Shamrock United  
The Dreamteam entered Europe with this entry from Dublin. A solid start went someway to indicating that the Craic may well be mighty but poor form after Christmas saw "The Rock" drop out of the running.
 
Soft Centres  
Having been promoted from the Beazer Old Folks Home League the previous season, the Soft Centres struggled in their debut season in the Dreamteam. Having spent big on their forward line, they had insufficient funds for the rest of the team and as a result, their defence was somewhat lacking. Rumours abound that they are about to fold, unable to stand the pace of professional football.
 
Spakatak Toxteth
The Merseysiders will be disappointed with their first full Dreamteam season. Having promised so much, they failed to deliver in the League and fell away badly towards the end. Having said that, they almost grabbed the Fair Play Trophy but in the end had to settle for midtable obscurity. Fancied to win next season if only on the basis that she no longer works for Gary.
 
St. Reatham FC
A strong debut season saw St. Reatham claim second spot but they'll be disappointed they didn't take first prize. A bad move in the transfer market saw them opt for Graeme Le Saux over Ian Harte, which cost them the title.
 
Sunday Stroolers
Promised much, in both the Cup and the League, before tailing off in the run-in. A Semi-Final spot and a top ten finish won't be much consolation to a team that led the field during the early part of the season.
 
Supersonic FC
A strong finish saw Supersonic FC consolidate their previous Top Ten Dreamteam finish, coupled with a Cup Semi-Final appearance. Manager Nicola Kelly underwent a name change in the finals weeks of the 2000/01 season in the hope of distracting her rivals, but it was too little too late. A poor mid-season put paid to her outside chances of a UEFA Cup spot.
 
The Lone Rangers
Having put aside the fact that you can hardly be alone when there's more than one of you, The Lone Rangers had a mixed season, which finally died a death in the closing weeks. The decision not to make any changes to their line-up saw Tonto wave the white flag and Silver shipped off to the knackers yard. The only way for them, is upů
 
The Porcelain Horse
Having won the inaugural title in 1999/2000 (under the guise of Ugly But Dangerous), everyone thought The Porcelain Horse were the team to beat. In the end, the pressure was too much for Callum Campbell and the Champion lost his crown without putting up a reasonable fight. Still, any team that can go an entire season at the top of the league cannot be written off. Expect a swift return next season. See Ugly But Dangerous.
 
Torpedo Bermondsey
The Bermondsey Boys will look back on their debut season with mixed feelings. Having started slowly, they sank to the bottom of the pack and looked down and out before a mid-season surge saw them fly up the table in a Lazarus-type fashion. Next year should see an improvement, providing Chelsea don't go under in the meantime.
 
Ugly But Dangerous  
Winners of the first-ever Dreamteam title in 1999/2000. Ugly But Dangerous led from the end of September until the end of the season and in all that time, no one got close. Needless to say, they won the title quite comfortably - thanks largely to the efforts of Kevin Phillips - but they struggled the following season and tried to hide the fact by changing their name. See The Porcelain Horse.
 
Villa Rejects  
If ever a team lived up to their name, it was the Villa Rejects. Packed with the crust-laden cream of Aston Villa's cast-offs, on paper the Rejects looked quite strong. In the end, they ended their debut season at the bottom of the pile to win the Wooden Spoon. Like the Soft Centres, the gulf in class between them and the rest of the League was all to apparent, and like the Soft Centres, they too have folded.