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Last poll:
Who has been the biggest waste of money so far?


1. Jaap Stam
27 votes (18%)

2. Sergei Rebrov
23 votes (15%)

3. Mark Schwarzer
21 votes (14%)

 
 
DUCK SOUP

Finally Neil has overcome his male pride and allowed the best manager, albeit a woman, to write the weekly update. About time too, I say.

Boys, this week's festive angel is once again me - Karen & Duck Utd - straddling the top of the X-mas tree for the second week. Having scored 46 points, I continue to look down on the baubles and trinkets below - cheap and gaudy and of very little interest - for a few of them the lights have already gone out.

And you thought he was arrogant...
Not content with my continued success, I have been offering my managerial services to the much needed Gazton Villa - this week's top scorer of 59 points. As a True Man Utd fan - and unlike Ash, I have been to Old Trafford - my dad used to take me as a kid to watch the cricket (Surely that's a different stadium, Karen?) - I'm not interested in the rest of the league, but here's your info:

St Reatham's in a dismal 2nd place while Luke Perry All -Stars is struggling to keep 3rd place. How Bill S Preston managed to only fall one place after scoring only 19 points this week is beyond me..... (Ron, fix my computer over Christmas and I'll advise you over the transfer window). Respect does have to go to Supersonic FC who also scored 46 point - you go girl!

Soft Centres still remain at the bottom. Let's face it - you're only worth 2 1/2 Sheringhams. Why did you even bother entering this year? Well at least you'll get your £10 back - just £130 less then what I'll be receiving from the rest of you suckers.

Callum and his Porcelain Horse continue to be stuck in mid-table, in 14th position, with 496 points - such a relief as he was such a cocky bastard last year. He kept gloating about Kevin Phillips....

I'll leave you with the lines of the infamous football chant:
"Whooaaa, Teddy Shearingham, Went to Duck Utd and won £140"

Karen

PS: Neil, reply from Watchdog. Anne Robinson says you're the weakest link - no hang-on - that's Millwall (And that joke is so old that Gary's considering using it in his set...).

POS TEAM PTS SC
1 DUCK UTD 689 46
2 ST. REATHAM FC 644 33
3 LUKE PERRY ALL-STARS 633 44
4 FREAKIN' LAST 601 39
5 BILL S PRESTON NORTH END 593 26
6 CRUMBS DM 584 37
7 SHAMROCK UNITED 583 49
8 SUNDAY STROOLERS 579 48
9 1897 - THE GOLDEN YEAR 543 40
10 A TASTE OF THE RAJ 539 34
11 GAZTON VILLA 534 59
12 SUPERSONIC FC 524 49
13 LION OF VIENNA SLEEPS TONIGHT 500 22
14 THE PORCELAIN HORSE 496 36
15 SPAKATAK TOXTETH 478 44
16 RUSHDEN ANNE DIAMONDS 464 37
17 BILLY'S BOOTS 461 3
18 MICHAEL BOLTON WANDERERS 458 34
19 TORPEDO BERMONDSEY 448 46
20 ATHLETICO SALFORD 440 49
21 BIRMINGHAM SHITTY 425 42
22 CRAZYHORSE FC 425* 39
23 THE LONE RANGERS 421 27
24 PATRICK DUFFY THISTLE 377 49
25 VILLA REJECTS 363 28
26 SOFT CENTRES 322 19
* Score in dispute