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TEAMS 2001-2002
 1897 The Golden Year
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 Keane As Mustard
 Lion of Vienna Sleeps
    Tonight

 Luke Perry All-Stars
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 Oh Sheffield
 Roísíns XI
 Salford Strokers
 Soft Centres
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Last poll:
Who has been the biggest waste of money so far?


1. Jaap Stam
27 votes (18%)

2. Sergei Rebrov
23 votes (15%)

3. Mark Schwarzer
21 votes (14%)

 
 
MEET THE MANAGER
THIS WEEK: CLARE DEVGNEYEVANEY NO.1

Age: 23

Occupation: LSE Events Manager

Reason for knowing Gary or Neil: Gary thinks he's my boss

Clothing measurement of Choice: shoe size 7

Fascinating fact: My shoulder can predict storms. scary and true.

Team: Spakatak Toxteth, named in the hope of emulating my mate's success with Spartak Garston, winners of the Liverpool Echo Dreamteam competition 95.

Who do you really support? Everton, the only football team on Merseyside.

When did you last see them play? When we beat the Manc scum 1-0, FA Cup Final, Wembley (R.I.P.), May 20th 1995

That's a bit long isn't it? Yes, I went to every home game between birth and 1995 (plus all of our many Wembley appearances) but since then I have always been too lazy or too skint or both. Me and Mark (St Retham) are making the pilgrimage to Goodison for the Leeds game at Xmas.

What's your favourite football song? There's only one Nicky Barmby, one Nicky Barmby, one Nicky Barmby... and thank fuck for that

Where do you think your team will finish? I'll probably miss out on the mid-table obscurity money. I reckon somewhere unremarkable in the top 10.

If your Dreamteam cruise ship was sinking, which player would you save first? David Unsworth. Useless, but fit as f*ck

Which one would you throw overboard? Ed De Goey. Useless, but ugly as f*ck

Who do you most want to beat? Gary, Mark and Craig. but I'd settle for Gary and Craig. Or even just Gary.

Who is the spawniest git in this year's dreamteam? Definitely Richard Mulcahy, who we all relished in taking the piss out of for having only 2 strikers and for 1 of them being Alan Smith, and who now thinks he should have been picked for the England job

What has irritated you the most in the last week? Being told by my mate that she saw Franny Jeffers on the VIP dancefloor in Cream. On the bloody dancefloor!!! Without a thought, no doubt, for the sufferings of Spakatak, or indeed Everton. Twat.

 
PREVIOUS MANAGERS
Clare Devaney
Ron Voce
Ashish Shah
Duncan Bryson
Nick Fletcher
Dave Nicholson
Nity Raj
Simon Stoker
Craig Hickson